Wedding Where?

I struggle with thinking about a location to get married. And by struggle, I mean a huge, epic, relentlessly tiring and emotionally charged, internal battle of immense pros and cons.

Probably 90% of the people in our state already know exactly where they want their ceremony. I know my best friend already knows. M and I live in a state that is predominantly LDS, which means that they usually get married in a temple.

However, M and I are not LDS, (although we are mistaken for it all the time, me more so than him) and so it is completely up to us where our ceremony is. Which is great. Wonderful.

Sort of. :/

See, the problem is that my family (extended-adopted Utah families non-withstanding... love you guys!) lives two states away, while his whole family is here. And so no matter where me plan it, someone will have to travel, it's just a matter of who and how far.

I know this is a decision that doesn't need to be made until we actually have a ring and a date... but it's driving me bonkers.

Compounded with the fact that although more people will have to travel to California, if we choose to do it there, it might be cheaper in the long run because my mother (the wedding planner, remember?) will be able to use her contacts to get us the things we/I want. (With the amazing exception of Henry, her florist, who has already told her that if Utah is the place, he will be there to do the flowers, he doesn't care! :D )

Did you struggle with picking a ceremony location? Anyone who thought about it as obsessively as me?

Ooooo, I like this...

First, a question:

Who actually keeps the favors they receive at weddings?

I think the only time I have, it was a packet that you plant in the ground, and it sprouted flowers. (Well, it was supposed to sprout flowers...)

So when I recently discovered a bride that used donations to a cause of the attendee's choice as her wedding favors, I have to admit, it really caught my eye.

Something that I'm sure only those cleaning up after a wedding know, but people don't seem to keep favors. I can't tell you how many times I've cleaned up after a wedding, and had a whole box of favors that people forgot. Those that do make it home are probably either tossed later or used/eaten (or whatever their purpose) and then forgotten.

I'm sure there are some of you out there that really do love wedding favors, but the majority seems to support the idea that they are frivolous. So why not make that money go to good use? At least donated, it will help someone in the long run...

Both M and I have people in our lives that we love who have been affected by cancer, so maybe we will make a donation to the American Cancer Society, or something. (Of course, I have to talk to him first... this is just my idea at this point.) Plus, I bet a lot of our guests know someone affected as well, so this would be a great thing for everyone, right?

Just a thought. (that I love!)

It's done!

Well, the prep is done. Now he just needs to drop to one knee and ask. lol :-P

Last night M asked my parents for their blessing. No one will tell me exact details, but I've been told that it was very sweet (my mom) and from the heart (mom again), that it wasn't as eloquent as practiced (M), my mom cried (M and dad), and that my dad was unprepared and in denial (mom and dad).

My poor mom, it was an emotional roller coaster yesterday. First that, then graduation, then meeting M's parents... I gave her like five hugs at graduation, she was crying so much!

Apparently when my best friend J said told my parents that M wanted to talk to them, my mom knew, but my dad walked around saying "That can't possibly be it, he wants to talk about what car we're taking to graduation. That can't be it." lol My dad is so cute sometimes. :-D

So now I get to be the nervous wreck every time M looks like he's going to kneel... He's already said that he's going to purposely drop to a knee to tie his shoes, while picking up things he's dropped, etc. etc.

And then the planning!!!

I don't quite see the appeal...

... of having paper straws at your wedding.

Maybe it makes me more of a "traditionalist", but I just don't see why certain brides love them.

I'm sure they work fine, and I'm sure they don't... well... deteriorate in your beverage as you drink. Because that would defy the very purpose of a straw. And although I certainly like their clean look, and the fact they come in multiple colors, I just don't see what they add to your special event. I suppose if you were having a themed wedding, they might fit in.

But there are some brides that simply squee over them, theme or not, and I'm not sure I understand.

Are there any current wedding trends that you dislike? Any that are a little off the radar that you wish more brides would love?

Did you?

So, my boyfriend is making jewelry inquiries and engagement noises.

Small inquiries for months, but I took these as "Someday in the future/let's make sure we're on the same page" and now less subtle inquiries... "What kind of metal do you like?" or "Do you like my sister/cousin/mother's ring? Why?"

And I know that in less than two weeks he'll have the perfect opportunity to talk to my parents without my presence (I'm graduating college so they'll be in town), and without trying to get to California (where I'm originally from) without me and without me knowing.

Which brings me to my question for the post. Do I tell my parents that I highly suspect there will be a blessing request coming their way? I've told him it's important to me, and I know that he's thought about it, but do I need to warn my parents? Or is that his job?

In other words, should I warn my parents of his intentions (which they probably already assume) or do I make it his job to tell them?

Talking with other married women, they almost all universally say to leave it alone, but I can't help but feel I'm throwing him to the wolves a teensy bit since he's only met them once when we traveled out there a couple of months ago. :/

At least all my siblings won't be joining us, my roommate has a story of when she tortured her now brother-in-law while waiting to speak to her parents. Small blessings I suppose.

Why do you think? Should I warn them? Or just leave it be?

I admit it...

I truly am a wedding planner's daughter.

Since the age of twelve I have watched my mother plan her events. And pretty close to there began helping/working on the events as well. Although I never really graduated to planner status, I certainly was right there in the thick of it.

My mom, L, didn't start out in wedding planning, it snuck up on her. Originally she only did fundraisers. But then one of her friend's daughters was getting married, and then one of her friends, and then one of my friends.... You can see where this is going. One wedding for this friend, one for that friend... and pretty soon you're doing weddings for people that you only tenuously have any kind of relationship with. (my best friend's cousin's brother-in-law's sister's friend from second grade....)

Which leads to me. Overly-analytical at weddings, knowledgeable about the costs of rentals, and ready to scrutinize every aspect of the day. (To myself of course, I'm not horribly mean.) I'm known to watch Say Yes to the Dress, My Fair Wedding, and Bridezillas, among other wedding-related shows. Sunday on the We network, or wedding show day, is my favorite television day of the week. I frequent wedding blogs, photographer's blogs, and I'm known to hang out on theknot.com. Why? Because I live and breathe that stuff. I truly enjoy it. Why? Because I was raised right there. I've seen successful weddings and flops. I've seen weddings done "on the cheap" and a couple that were several thousand dollars. The whole gamut was just part of growing up, and is firmly ingrained in my brain.

Now, with my boyfriend asking jewelry questions and making engagement noises, I though I might need a place to put down my thoughts. Also, it's been suggested that I become a planner myself. (Something my mother has been trying to convince me of for the last couple of years.) And it might be nice to have a place to show brides that I actually have every idea of what I'm talking about... and they should trust me with the most important day of their lives thus far. :D

So here we go!